Making
The Struggle Worth The Hassle...
I'm
not made for emotional pain and heartache. It destroys me to the
core. The situation with my Husband's prostate cancer has all but
destroyed me in so many ways, yet I still come out fighting. Fighting
for him, because when it all comes down to the basics, he
is MY Husband. MINE!!! and
there isn't a single person on earth who will feel his loss as much
as me, or even the same way that I would. Keeping him alive and
feeling well is my number one priority. I might destroy myself in the
process, but as long as he is alive and feeling well, I win. I would
gladly sacrifice my life for him, and these aren't just words on a
page or a computer document. I mean it, and
unless you've seen me, the whole me, you have no idea just how
strongly I feel that.
Now,
before I go off on a tangent, One of the final things the original GP
did was refer my Husband to an Oncologist. This wasn't just an
Oncologist, but one of the best and highest rated in the area, but we
didn't know that. All we knew was that this Oncologist was local, and
he had a funny name. The appointment was on Monday last week (3-18),
and after all the stress, we didn't have very high hopes. The pile of
paperwork they handed to my Husband was more than he's ever filled
out before. When he was called in, we went into a nice exam room and
waited. My emotions have been all over the place, and my husband has
been guarded in showing his since the last breakdown in tears over a
month ago, and this Oncologist with the funny name put us both at
ease, and he listened.
Being heard is the one thing that was lacking with our original GP,
and I've had it with false reassurances. I want the truth, my Husband
wants the truth, and both of us want to do whatever we can so my
Husband lives as long as possible, and stays feeling well.
The
Bad News:
I'm
not a fool. I spent years caring for people who were close to death,
and I've seen more than my share of people dying, so when the
Oncologist said that if my husband went untreated, he could expect to
live "maybe a year." I wasn't surprised. I kind of expected
it. After all, my Husband had advanced aggressive metastatic prostate
cancer that is in his lymph system.
The
Good News:
The
Oncologist said that the first line of defense was prescribing an
anti-androgen medication that would reduce the testosterone in my
Husband's body, because prostate cancer feeds on testosterone.
Casodex taken once a day decreases testosterone production.
The
Treatment Plan:
According
to the Oncologist, Casodex will often stop the prostate cancer in its
tracks. Lupron injections will be used as well, but sometimes Lupron
will actually increase the testosterone levels at first, which is why
they start with Casodex. Another side effect is that his hair on his
head might even grow! (yummy long hair!) That made
me smile, because I love my Husband's long hair, and I was afraid it
might fall out. Apparently not with the starting treatments.
Tests
Ordered:
1.
Blood tests for PSA and Testosterone as a start, because there's a
good chance that those have both increased, and the goal is to get
the PSA to 0 (zero) This will be done on a regular basis.
2.
Full body CT scan to find out how much the cancer has metastasized.
Ordered as URGENT but we're still waiting on
insurance to approve the test.
3.
Brain MRI to determine if the cancer has metastasized to the brain.
Ordered as URGENT but we're still waiting on
insurance to approve the test.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The
NEW GP:
Strangely
enough, my Husband's new GP also has a funny last name, and when I
tell people they laugh, because one is the opposite of the other.
Negative Things:
Parking
is difficult to find. We also had to wait in the waiting room for
about an hour, and then another hour in the exam room.
Positive Things:
When
the doctor came in, he was thorough. In fact, he spent over an hour
talking and asking important questions, including about the prostate
cancer. He ordered a full panel of blood tests for my husband
including blood sugar, A1C, liver function and kidney function, plus
a few others I can't remember. He was definitely worth the wait.
How We
Feel:
We
finally feel like our concerns are being taken seriously. We're
feeling much more positive and good because both the Oncologist and
GP are actively listening and involved, and not leaving us in the
dark. Yes, this is an uphill battle, and I've been under extreme
stress, and it has affected my general health, but I know it will get
better. My husband is slowly starting to talk about things, and I
think that our relationship will only improve. No longer feeling
helpless, I'm speaking up, and (finally!) my husband is too. We also
jointly decided that appointments are to be made in the early
afternoon.
Still,
we wait, but no longer passively.
